Comments by Sam Miller

Alright so this actually doesn't look too bad. Tbh I think you trying to "strike while the iron is hot" wasn't a bad move. I think you probably could have gone about it in a better way by asking her what her schedule is instead of continue to suggesting times hoping that one of them would work (so something like "Sure, what's your schedule like?") - it's unfortunate that she replied the way she did but here's where the biggest fuckup came and I think you know what I'm going to say.

I think you took the law student thing way too seriously. She's just mentioning that she's busy, not that she's more busy than you, or that she's somehow getting less sleep than you and therefore can't meet. Your response was unnecessary and came off very bitter (reactive). I'm glad you're recognizing that but that's pretty much the only major fuckup I see here. I think you would have been fine if you had just said what you suggested or even just liked her message.

As for reengaging, I would wait at least 2-3 days, maybe a little longer and probably reengage with something like "How are you feeling?"

Agree with Tom here for the most part. While it may seem like this girl is a time-waster, you need to show restraint and patience. If you seriously want to try and meet up with her, don’t keep pushing and pushing and pushing.

It seems like you’re trying the same thing over and over again without changing your approach, which is fine when it comes to being persistent but you need to like Tom said, balance the pushing for a date with some humor, more importantly, some banter to get the girl attracted to you. Logic will only get you so far and even though you’ve been trying to make plans with her, it’s clear she’s not attracted enough to make solid plans. To be fair, it may be true that she will never be that and she’s wasting your time but with the amount of investment she’s showing you, I think it’s more likely that she’s interested but not fully convinced.

When you banter with her and then try to make plans again vs. just trying to make plans over and over again you have a better shot. I’ll give you a real world example; going in for the kiss. When you go in for the kiss and she rejects you, you don’t keep trying and trying and trying to kiss her. You move on, recognize that she’s not comfortable yet, and continue bantering and building comfort before escalating again. You also don’t try and logic your way into it (ie: “oh but we sexted over the phone why can’t you kiss me rn” type shit) either.

I'll say though I've experienced this with a lot of girls in the past (the whole ignoring a lot of what you say, being difficult to make plans with, and so on) and the best way I've found to deal with this is the following: not responding or continuing their conversation and guiding it back to the meetup.

For the first one, it's all about the idea of rewarding good behavior. Now, I don't mean like some sort of animal but I mean don't show her interest if she doesn't respond to your texts if she ignores you or your attempt to make plans, ignore when she slides up on your story a couple of times. Don't give her attention if she's just ignoring your texts to try and make plans with her.

The second one is a little bit more time-consuming and requires a fair amount of patience. It comes down to enertaining her comments/texts (ie: "why do you always like that angle?" -> "why? are you jealous of my thick thighs?") entertain it but fuck with her a little. Don't just back down and let her continue the conversation. Then, slowly guide it back to you and her hanging out.

The problem is you take it to an extreme and you combine the two, ignoring what she said but also responding with your own text about how you want to meet her and make plans with her. That type of callout used like that is not going to work very often with these types of girls.

Sorry if this was long and a little harsh, hope it helps

Ok a couple things here:

1. The “took you while” sounds needy and you shouldn’t normally address a girl leaving you on seen for a couple hours unless it’s an extended period of time. People get busy, they do other shit, they forget etc. no need to really “call it out” as it comes across a little desperate

2. You’re right haha you’re over thinking this. 2-3 days and a takeaway, that’s that. Either “Don’t think too hard now” or “Damn don’t get shy on me _____” or any number of other ones as long as you haven’t used them before.

3. I might look to number close and get this off insta. Like you said, she probably has a fair amount of suitors trying to text her etc. on insta, my guess is less so over whatsapp or imessage.

Funny that you guys matched back in 2018 tho. Anyway, goodluck bro

I agree in a sense here but you don’t NEED to sexualize to achieve a wine date at all. It’s ideal but not necessary for the interaction to go forward. Anyway, I would just address the alcohol concern head on. Something like “What exactly is your concern?” or “Why’s that?” -> after she voices her concern, depending on the severity I would try to first use humor to play it off and then maybe mention the fact that you don’t drink coffee at night, you can also always offer the compromise of going somewhere that serves both

Agree with Jake honestly, not only is she low investment but if you look at the ratio of her texts to yours, you’re investing FAR more than she is, and there’s nothing wrong with that at the beginning to get things going but once you’re going back and forth the idea is for her to have equal investment if not MORE than you to assure she’s interested. As you can see here, she’s clearly not unfortunately.

I agree, in fact, I think you build more comfort and interest when you do this but it's hard to continue roleplaying here because she's not giving you much. You could try to reference something in her pictures..

I don't use FB but just friend her and go with "You look super familiar.."

Lmao, I agree for the most part; and her "archetype" is correct but I don't love putting girls in boxes like that because it's not super helpful most of the time. Anyway, I would totally soft close with some wine although I would look to continue escalating little by little via text so the date goes smoother.

You don't necessarily have to keep a roleplay going from an opener all the way, you can always alternate between that and some get to know you talk. Then, you can reference it later and use it. From here I might just go with "How's your hump day?"

Exactly, would love to see some SS as in my experience and others I've talked to, I've found that number closing separates you from the pack, reduces flaking, and builds loads of comfort.