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Her bio says “ur place or ur place?”, followed by her Snapchat name. I don’t want to be too generic with an opening line due to her bio, but I’m not sure if immediately calling it out would be too much too fast. Any suggestions?
It’s been almost exactly a year since this happened, but it was so hilarious that I thought I’d share this insane Hinge interaction. So to set the scene, it’s the Monday after Thanksgiving, and these following events took place over the course of just three hours. We’d been talking for about a week now, pretty innocent conversation. It’s around 2:00 and the subject of exercise comes up. Out of the blue, she asks if I ever get aroused or even if I’ve orgasmed during a workout. Very unexpected, and obviously no, I don’t orgasm while working out. We chat a bit about that, she says it happens to her most during cardio, and I comment that I’m always way too exhausted during cardio to be aroused. See first two pictures for context of how that goes. This was a rapid-fire conversation where we were both responding within a minute or two, when after her message in the second picture, she just went silent. 30 minutes later, she responds again, apologizing for the delay but she had to go “take care of herself” because of how hot the conversation was making her. She then proceeds to tell me exactly how she “took care of herself”, (see third picture). She then laments about how unfortunate it is that she can’t send pictures on Hinge, so I asked for her number. First thing she sends me on there is a video of her playing with her boobs, (first nude I’d ever received). After that, the conversation went rather abruptly back to how it had been going for the last few days, (that is not super sexual out of nowhere), and at around 4:00 at this point I try setting up a date at my place, which she agrees to. Now here is where the story makes a complete 180° turn. Unfortunately she was sticking almost exclusively to voice notes at this point, so I wasn’t able to screenshot them. After agreeing to the date, she casually mentions that she’s practicing celibacy. For obvious reasons I think she’s joking and ask her to elaborate. She then sends two 5-minute-long voice notes about how she’s a devout “follower of Christ”, and how people who call themselves Christians aren’t really followers of God, but that they just are trying to look cool, (never heard of someone pretending to be Christian in order to be cool, but whatever), and that sex is something that should only ever be done between husband and wife, and only ever for the sake of reproduction, not pleasure. She goes on and on about this sort of crap for a while. Then mentions that she knows that’s a lot of information to deal with, and if I want an out, she totally understands. I immediately jump at that opportunity, (politely), and she gets super pissed off, going on about how I’m so superficial, men are only interested in sex and you can never find a decent guy on dating apps, bla bla bla. I just told her she should probably mention the celibacy thing on her dating profile, then blocked her, and that was the end of that.
So I recently noticed a pattern with my dating life: first dates at my place go well, but public first dates almost never lead to a second date. I figured out that it’s because I’m terrible at building sexual investment in public. It usually is just platonic conversation the whole time, and even though it often ends in a kiss at the end of the date, they’ve seemed surprised a little too often for my liking. Any suggestions on how to improve on that front would be greatly appreciated.
So my fwb is moving away on Wednesday, and when we hung out for the last time two days ago, she offered to set me up with her hot friend, (who I’ve never met but seen plenty of pictures of), or at least ask her if she’d be interested. Later that night fwb texted me that her friend was interested and wanted me to DM her on Instagram. Okay, perfect. But I’m a notorious overthinker in unfamiliar situations, and I’ve never been setup before. I can’t decide when I should DM her, (before or after my fwb moves), or what I should say. I know very little about her, but I’ve been the subject of girl talk between her and my fwb, so she probably knows more about me than I’d like. My sister suggested that I just introduce myself (duh) and ask if she wants to hang out in the very first message. I know that asking a girl out right away is a terrible idea on apps, but this is a setup, so maybe that's the best move. I’d be grateful for any advice on how to approach the situation.
I know the “I’m bored!” is a clue, as well as mentioning that she’s only visiting, but I’m not sure exactly how to follow it up. It’s only her second message, so I’m hesitant to move too far too fast, but I don’t want to be too slow either. Thoughts?
I discovered this purely by accident on a first date the other day. We were sitting close to each other on the couch and sort of facing each other. She had used some kind of nice shampoo or conditioner or something, and I was leaning in to smell her hair, and I noticed that she started to lean in too for the first half second because she thought I was going for a kiss, before she realized what I was doing. Obviously led to making out a few seconds later, but it occurred to me that that’s actually a pretty good way to test if she’s ready to cross that threshold. Lean in to smell her hair, and if she’s not into it and leans back or looks away, she’ll realize in less than a second that you weren’t actually going for a kiss, and you can tell from how she reacted how to proceed without any awkwardness. Just thought I’d share that experience; I hope it helps!
So I went on a date with some girl, and it went REALLY well at first. Things were escalating very nicely; there was plenty of oral on both sides and fingering/handjobs, plus she had the biggest natural tits I’ve ever seen. Then, once we reached the natural point of sex, she reveals that she’s a virgin and waiting until marriage. A couple more details about this: she’s 22 and this was the first date she’d ever been on; she’d gotten physical with a guy once before in the same way we just were, but only the one time, and she had decided that since she had been a virgin this long, she may as well stick it out until marriage. Now I already know that what we have is going nowhere long-term and the no sex thing is an absolute dealbreaker for me, but I had a thought that since she’d never been on a date before and had only been intimate once before, she may not have had any real temptation to abandon that very archaic idea that most Christians ignore, and that maybe she’ll change her mind after a few more dates, during which I can at least practice my oral skills. Is this an absolute waste of time or not?
So I went on a date with this very hot Arabic girl in early December. She was one of those girls that had an Instagram page full of pictures and reels of herself, which wasn’t too surprising given how hot she was. Anyway, the date didn’t lead to sex, but that didn’t surprise me because she was clearly not the sort of person that would fuck on the first date. We planned the next date at my place, but then surprise, her parents had arranged her marriage to someone, and since she’s Muslim she had to obey their wishes. She finished this with “we can still be friends”. Yeah, whatever. I was nice about it, and fully expected to never hear from her again. That was that. Then a little over a week ago, she messaged me on Hinge saying her Instagram had gotten hacked, (we matched on Hinge but she immediately moved us over to Instagram), and wondered if she could have my number. Very odd, but I decided to play this out. She asked if she could come over to hang out because she’s had a rough day. I’m assuming at this point that she just wants to hang out as friends like she said earlier, which I had zero interest in, but I figured sex might be a possibility if I’m lucky, and she was easily twice as hot as the next best-looking girl I’d ever matched with, so I figured, why not? She comes over, we chat for a bit, and she leaves 45 minutes later. A bit of a bummer, but she’d kept things super platonic the whole time, and was clearly acting as a friend. Five days later, she texts to ask if we can hang out again, but cancels at the last minute. She does the same thing the next day, then hits me up on Sunday asking to hang out at 3, cancels, then two hours later says she can come at 3 again. She eventually does come over, and at this point I can’t tell what this is. Is this as friends or a date? I don’t know. We’re just chatting for a bit and she is asking me questions about if I’m dating anyone, if I still like her, and other frustratingly unclear things. I’m so confused so I just leap to the bottom of it and tell her I thought she was engaged. She then goes on about how she was, but he’s terrible, is always busy and traveling, and never talks to her, and she wants to break up with him, and that’s why she started talking to me again. At this point she stretches out, puts her head in my lap, and just starts talking about how much he sucks and how frustrating it is for her. (I should mention that she’s not American, English is clearly her second language, and she’s from a different culture, so I couldn’t tell what was a hint from her or not, so I did absolutely nothing here). After about 20-30 minutes of this, she apologizes for making me depressed, I tell her I’m not depressed at all, then she sits up and starts making out with me, which I thought MIGHT happen, but I was still very surprised. She then took control pretty quickly here, crawling onto my lap, pulling out her huge tits and feeding them to me, reaching down my pants, asking if I had a condom, and things went pretty smoothly from there. She was SUPER loud, like to the point that neighbors probably heard pretty easily, and she also came super easily like 4 or 5 times, once from nipple play alone. After she left, she texted me a few hours later apologizing for what happened, that I know where she’s at right now and she’s sorry for everything. Alright, whatever. Tbh, the sex wasn’t that good, at least not for me. I never ended up finishing, and she was acting weird. I’m not entirely sure how to describe it, but she just seemed very desperate, if that makes any sense. Sex-starved is really the best way I can describe it. She acted like how a starving person does when they find a buffet. Which you’d think was a good thing, except she just seemed so frantic and in such a rush with everything that I couldn’t really take the time to enjoy it as much as I would’ve liked. That and her very loud volume were definitely a bit of a turnoff. I don’t know what will happen with this. Maybe it’s done, maybe not. I can’t really say for sure.
I asked her what she was looking for on here, (Bumble), and she responded with: First text: “Just a new bee” Second text: “Around” I have no idea what that’s supposed to mean, and I’m not sure asking her what that means outright or just saying okay and moving on is the right call. Thoughts?
So I have an issue where when I’m banging a girl for the first time, I get overly excited and tend to finish way too quickly. I’m working on the excitement part, but in the meantime I’ve been using some numbing spray to compensate, which works great. The problem is that I need to apply it pretty close to when we start making out for it to work effectively. But most of the girls in my area tend to be on the more conservative side, so it takes a lot longer to build sexual tension and escalate to the point that we’re making out, and I can’t really leave in the middle of that to apply it because then I’m leaving her alone for a minute or two and ruining the momentum. And that problem only gets worse if I do it later. Is there a particular window to do this where it doesn’t ruin the momentum, but also isn’t too early?