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Would love feedback from the coaches on your underlying principles/beliefs, here’s mine:
Using the "You're my type" too early on in the interaction without getting her to qualify first. I see a lot of guys using this in their screenshots for openers.
What’s the principle behind using “You’re my type” as an opener?
My belief is if you don't even get to know her personality first and you're already saying "You are just my type!" based on her photos, then she knows she already has you won over because she know's she's hot. She won't chase you.
If you say "You're my type" before you show value and she qualifies they always respond like this:
"Thanks", "I know I am", "Of course, I'm always cute", "I'm everyone's type", etc. Which is a terrible frame to be in.
You're literally just giving her dopamine hits of validation for free and now in the chasing frame with all the other guys she matched. Instead you need to show that you are the selector, the seller, you need to screen her. Are you this, are you that? Is she good enough for me? She needs to prove herself to me. What does she actually have besides being sexy that makes her my type
Now if she qualifies herself, then you can use it as a reward and say "This (whatever she qualifies) makes you exactly my type" now she knows that it's because of her personality and not her looks. If she is being overly feisty, you can disqualify her to force her to chase a bit.
Fair point, but I don’t remember ever getting that kind of reaction, most girls say something like “haha oh really” or “what’s your type”
Also, I always say “You SEEM like my type”
It is very subtle. but that could make a huge difference.
Adding in "seem" definitely sounds much better.
It reminds me of the situation where someone uses 2 compliance requests in 1 text e.g. "We should get together sometime soon. When are you free?"
Instead of having her confirm "We should get together sometime soon" first before continuing with when are you free
But I agree with the way you say it "You seem like my type" would be so much more effective because it generates curiosity compared to "You're just my type" or "You're exactly my type" as an opener which is a definitive statement.
Lots of times girls would just respond to me with "Thanks", then what? That's the reason that got me to think about this.
To be honest man, it's it a difference, but not that big of a difference. For instance, I actually used to say "We should get together sometime soon. What's your schedule like?"
as one text in my earlier years.
If you go through my lay reports from around 2016 you'll see that exact phrasing.
When I started separating those into 2 separate messages overall my results improved a bit, but it was far from a night and date difference. At the end of the day, it's seldom one thing that makes or breaks the interaction. My philosophy has always been to optimize everything and use volume to my advantage. Hope this helps.
Exactly I had girls saying „How can you know I'm your type you've only seen pictures“ and stuff like that. That's why I started opening with a bait and then saying „You seem like you could be just my type“ leaves a little uncertainty which is always good. Otherwise you're framing her as the prize and she thinks that she has already won you over.
If they respond with „I know I am“ or just a „Thanks“ I usually say Oh she's confident. Not even going to ask what my type is?
