Newbie to Tinder, critical feedback and be brutal pls

Brutal honesty... your text game is terrible. It is at the point, where it is literally killing your chances with every girl you talk to (from what I can see). The two biggest issues I see are :

1. Being fancy / gamey - I covered this extensively in my product, but the short summary is that trying to be fancy or gamey just makes you look weird and creeps girls out . this is precisely what I saw in your screen shots. By the end of each interaction, each girl likely went from thinking "who is this cute guy?" to "this guy is weird as fuck, but is kind of entertaining so I just respond to see what he says next" .
   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F16tI29Jtb4
   Check out this video man to get an idea of my text game. You'll see how simple it can be. Then, contrasted to what what you doing. I think that will help you moving forward.
2. Complete lack of social intuition- this was most drastically visible in your last interaction. The girl was extremely DTF and down for come over for sex that nigh. She literally just wanted to add a quick dining experience to your rendezvous so as not to feel like as slut. Literally, all you had to do was say "Deal :)" that simple and you would have gotten laid . Instead, you said " I ate" , which not only created a giant obstacle but also lowered you value, because it showed your lack of social awareness .
   There are bunch of other mistakes as well, but these two are definitely your biggest ones. If you can learn to keep things simple and pick up on queues that girls give you your results will drastically improve :)

I mean that girl you were texting wanted to fuck. It was on you to go for the hard close and make specific plans at that point.
You're not a complete autist, but your texting is too goofy. Try and refrain from the paragraphs on mars and shit haha. You don't need to be more sexual though.

Also, the way you're going for the tea close isn't optimal.
This can be applied to tea, but what I do is guess what kinda drink the girl is into and ask her if she likes it. Wine if I can't guess.
Here's an exact transcript from a girl I banged last night:

(back and forth talking about her sport)
Me:Do you like wine
Her:"Yeah; wine's my fave (emoji)"
Me:Well you seem cool lets have some wine this wk
Her:"Lit! I think I'm mostly free Friday evening and all of Saturday. (emoji)"
Me:Cool we'll make plans whats your number
Her:(redacted, don't want you stealing my girl)