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Met with this girl on tinder about a week ago, chatted for a bit and it was obvious we were both interested. Turns out she was visiting my city in the upcoming days to see her girl friend so it was perfect and I asked her out. She agreed and we had a great first date.
Showed her around a bit, we drank wine by the beach and watched the sun set. Eventually we kissed and had a lil make out sesh. As she was staying with her friend that night, I took her to her friend's place and I could tell she had a great time with me.
I followed up after the date, all good. I texted her 2 days later or something so we could chat a bit more and ask each other questions and get to know each other a bit more and so on, but she is not really engaging or taking any initiative. So I stopped texting to see if she takes action. She is on holidays so as far as I know she doesn't have much things to do.
She is also visiting the same friend on New Year's and she was asking me at the end of our date about something we could do all together but corona is messing things up
What would you do?
TLDR: Awesome first date, seems to have lost interest, what to do?
unfortunately what you are describing is quite common. Likely the date did not go as well as you think it did. Don't get me wrong im sure she had fun but if sex didnt happen it wasn't as good as it could have been. Theres a good chance this chick was secretly hoping that she could get fucked and was left disappointed since that didn't happen. That explains why shes being distant. This is why i always try to make sex happen on first date if possible. It is the best thing you can do if you want to see the girl again. You can post some screen shots of the interaction and we can try to help you better.
My question is, how would you reengage after this?
I have met a few girls that are not into it in the first date, however I couldn't tell if this one wanted it, since we barely had time as she was meeting her friend. So it just made sense to make out and not push for sex, and in another date, it would happen.
She is currently on holidays from uni, so she is quite bored and staying up all night, I am sure she is talking with another dudes since she keeps changing her tinder profile.
I asked her out in a voice memo for the afternoon of NYE since we have a lockdown but she was busy at that moment so I am not sure if she is ignoring it and leaving me on read or just didn't hear until the end or something. Note: She has to study next week for her university exams, so it might be even harder to plan something?!
Would be great to post some screen shots but the conversation is not in English and we also send a lot of voice memos. Thanks!
its really hard for me to give you lines without me seeing screenshots, But to answer your question generally. Just follow your advice that i give on 5 steps to setting up the date video. And if shes being un responsive then use a takeaway, (see my latest video)
I mean an awesome first date usually ends in sex. There's not a lot of context but I think you need to sexualize more. And you need to take the initiative not her. She is only in town for a couple of days or weeks or whatever. You need to drill the lead and get her out again and have sex with her. Shes probably hesitant because you didn't sexualize enough.
So my question is, how should I reengage?
I tried with the questions about herself to see if we could build more chemistry but she didn't really seem enthusiastic.
you have a point! I am not that experienced so it was a great first date for my standards lol. I don't really know what she was looking for so didn't want to push it, also having her to go back to her friend's didn't help.
And she is only a 30min drive away so it is not a big deal, I just got lucky she was visiting my town otherwise I would have set the date regardless.
Yes I know I gotta take the lead but I don't want to be over texting and double texting and ended up sounding needy.
Wait a day or two if you can and say something like "Hey sexy" and go from there, that opener sounds a little crass but it puts a slightly more sexual spin on the convo and if I'm understanding correctly as Davis said, you need to lead, take a risk, fuck it, bro, go for it. Women like men that go after what they want and aren't afraid to show intent, she might have lost interest because you didn't take it a step further but that's ok, it went well and you have another opportunity, so don't waste it. Rejection>Regret but in this case since everything went so well and you guys vibed??? No brainer bro. Goodluck
"I texted her 2 days later or something so we could chat a bit more and ask each other questions and get to know each other a bit more and so on, but she is not really engaging or taking any initiative. So I stopped texting to see if she takes action. She is on holidays so as far as I know she doesn't have much things to do."
1 you are past getting to know each other over text. This is extremely boring and probably feels like nails on a chalkboard to her. You're already familiar you should be having int
