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Hey fellas, new to this community but hoping I can learn and contribute.
About me:
I’m a 29 year old lawyer from Australia. I’ve been a student of the game since 2013. I’ve had a string of successful relationships and LR since then. My pattern seems to be that I go out, have a good time, see success then eventually meet a girl and settle down for a couple of years. When I come out of the relationship it takes me a while to bounce back and see results.
The current situation:
TL; DR: I started texting a girl I’ve already met in person being quite Beta. I then attempted to reframe and call-out her flakey behavior but that didn’t work and I now need advice on how to continue.
I’m 29, fit and train at a Cross Training and Muay Thai (kickboxing) gym. There are quite a few attractive girls, one of whom I added on FB and started messaging. She is 21 and exactly my type. Our interactions in person have been very positive.
As you’ll see in the first few screenshots, it started out with somewhat high interest/investment on her part. I failed to build attraction so the replies started to come later and later. I also failed to ‘soft close’ which lead to a few excuses when it came to meeting up. Finally, I qualified her too late in the interaction.
Please bear in mind that this is my first interaction after the end of a 2-year relationship, so my confidence was relatively low. I also have to tread carefully when it comes to sexualizing the interaction as we train at the same gym and I don’t want to jeopardize that by creating an awkward situation.
After reviewing the PWF content, I decided to try re-frame and get the conversation on the right track. As you’ll see, there was some success but ultimately the interest remained low. I also failed to properly soft close by communicating the offer at the same time as asking for her schedule.
I got to the point of using hard call-outs which didn’t work. In hindsight, I believe I should have handled the logistics better. I then happened to be in town with another girl this past Saturday and saw this girl out. We didn’t speak but I’m confident that she watched me dancing and having a good time.
The last message I sent was last Friday, which she read immediately but didn’t respond to until today. She responded by laughing at my last call-out. I need advice as to whether I should continue and if so, how? Should I just cut my losses in the interaction entirely?
My thoughts are that I should respond on Sunday by sending her a meme of my best friend’s husky to try and get the investment back on track, subtlety sexualise and soft close again by making a joking reference to her ‘month in advance’ schedule. The issue with that course of action is that I will let her get away with the flakey behavior.
I see my other option as a final hard call-out along the lines of ‘I think you’re cute and potentially interesting but you clearly aren’t interested, so I won’t invest anymore time and that’s okay. I’ll see you round at the gym’ or ‘I must give you credit for making this as difficult as possible’. Another option could be ‘I genuinely didn’t take you for the flakey type’.
I’ve already learnt from my mistakes in this interaction and will post a LR with another girl later on. In the meantime, I would appreciate any advice you can give as to whether this situation is salvageable. Please be as critical as possible. I want to learn from this.
You should have puked back when we said she was difficult to make plans with.. your not responding to anything she’s saying.. women want to be herd.. make her feel like you care a bit about what she’s saying.. I think your trying to move things forward to fast.. engage in her comments a bit more.. you could have qualified her a bit when she’s said “is that me” I’d definitely play the prize card here but in a more toned down way.. like nonchalant. But then, make her wait for your txt if your gonna do that. You can’t be the prize and reply every 2 seconds.. try pulling back a bit. She saw you with another girl so that would make her interested. Did she hit you up after you saw her? If she mentions he just brush it off like she wasn’t your type. You need someone better.
Thanks for the reply. Yeah I agree, I became too eager and it came across as pushy. She saw me on Saturday and responded today (Tuesday). No mention of seeing me out. I just don’t know how to progress from here...
Definitely don’t mention it to her first lol.. play it cool, lay back a little maybe.. you could give her just enough attention to stay interested.. kinda hard to close with out some more investment from her first at this point she could be skeptical if she saw you.. you have to get her to mention it to you first.. then play the right angle like ehhh she wasn’t good enough..
screenshot convo was painful to read